In 2012, I was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer. It was a huge blow to my husband and I, as he had been battling cancer for 12 years. It was difficult for our three children to see both parents going through tough trials, but His outpouring grace and mercy sustained us as a family.
On the night that I had the double mastectomy, I experienced hot searing pain along the sutures and I cried out to God. He instructed me to bind the pain and command it to walk out of my body, and it did! I sensed tiny movements along my chest and arms and the pain subsided. Chemotherapy had very severe side effects on me. My legs were weak, and I could not walk for days. Anticipating that hair would drop, I had my head shorn. It was difficult for me to comprehend why I was in that condition. I examined my heart for unforgiveness towards anyone, unresolved grief and sorrow. I thought I had dealt with emotional pain long ago but there were layers undiscovered and hence uncovered. Most days, I sat in the Presence of Papa God to hand Him every negative emotion that the Holy Spirit had revealed and received His divine exchange. As I went through those encounters, there was deep cleansing in my soul and the assurance of God’s healing in my physical body. He also gave me keys for healing as I connected with Him more. In 6 months, I bounced back into normal routine, work and ministry.
5 years later, I discovered I had colon cancer. At that time, it was even more difficult to deal with the situation as my husband’s condition began to deteriorate further. Again, He gave us more grace and mercy to cope with the emotional upheavals, physical pain and financial uncertainties. Thank the Lord, the surgery to remove part of the colon went well and the doctor declared that I did not need chemotherapy. My mind and body suffered much trauma from the whole process but the verse in Romans 8:11, ‘The Spirit of God, who raised Jesus from the dead, lives in you. And just as God raised Christ Jesus from the dead, he will give life to your mortal bodies by this same Spirit living within you.’ sustained us. My husband went home to glory a year later. God extended his life for 17 years and he had led a full life, always joyous in the Lord.
During that episode of colon cancer, I was leading Freedom Ministry – the inner healing and deliverance ministry in Cornerstone. Some close friends had asked questions which others might have considered too sensitive. They asked if I had opened doors to the enemy, and if my sickness was an attack of the enemy, if I had unforgiveness or bitterness against anyone, if I had blamed God and would I lose faith in God’s healing virtue. My answers were no, no, no, no and no! Again, I made a choice to bathe myself in God’s Presence and focused on His goodness by meditating on His Word. Psalm 23 and 121 were key verses that kept me strong. I knew then and even now that God heals and I’ve never been stumbled by those two bouts of infirmities. In fact, He strengthened my faith and I’ve learnt that I can count on Jehovah Roi, the God who sees us.
I’m grateful for our pastors and leaders in Cornerstone for constantly teaching and carrying the anointing for healing and advancing this culture of healing and caring as a community. To God be the glory and honour!
